Life with Child(ren)

Life with kids 001

^^Check it out.. I can totally watch two kids at once..I got this

I have had so much help since Remi was born. My parents got into town the evening he was born and my mom has been so great at keeping the house clean, meals on the table and taking care of Evelyn so I could focus on having a newborn again. So it wasn’t until she took some time away from the house to go shopping with my sister that I realized what having two kids is like. Let me spell it out for you.

::

It was noon. Nap time for Evelyn. Apparently lunch time for Remi. But Remi was asleep so I used the opportunity to get Evelyn in bed. We had made a quick drive thru run to Chik-fil-a so my food sat on the table while I attempted this little game of ‘make-all-the-kids-happy.’

I changed Evelyn’s diaper and started singing her a song just in time to hear Remi start to cry. I tried to sing louder to drown out the cries but Evelyn was too distraught to pay attention to the song. So I gave her a quick kiss, closed the door and rushed out to soothe baby boy. He had worked himself into such a frenzy that I had to calm him down before he’d start eating. But once he did start nursing there was glorious silence. He fell asleep after only eating on one side and since I was hungry I decided to put him in his swing until I finished my lunch.

As soon as I sat down at the table I could hear Evelyn from her bedroom, “MOM!!! MOM!!” *Sigh.

So I headed back into her room to sing to her a little more and get her calmed down enough to go to sleep. And what do you imagine happened by the time a slid her door closed? That’s right, Remi was up and ready to nurse on the other side. All the while, my food sat on the table getting colder and colder.

::

Things have gotten a little better since then. I’ve kind of figured out a system. But since I never really know when Remi is going to cry, the system isn’t fool proof by any means. The other night Remi started screaming while I was putting Evelyn to bed and I asked her if I could go feed him. She looked at me thoughtfully and said a resounding, “Yes.” and went to sleep on her own.

life with kids 002

 

^^Bathing two kids at once! Total pro. Okay, I’ll be honest…I only washed Remi. Chris washed Evelyn.

The hardest part is when I’m nursing Remi and Evelyn comes up to me with her puppy dog eyes and says, “Hold you mom?” (She gets me and you confused so that means ‘hold me’). I try to explain that I will pick her up as soon as Remi is done eating but I’m afraid that’s going to lead to lots of resentment.

It’s hard to figure out the whole discipline thing. I know she’s acting out for attention because of her brother so I don’t want to punish her. I want her to know that I love her just as much as him. But at the same time I don’t want her to think she can get away with throwing tantrums. It’s a fine line and it’s difficult to find.

I’ve also found that I feel guilty like 85% of the time. My family and even Chris do a really good job of playing with Evelyn so she’s not always watching TV. And then I have a chance to take a nap or take care of Remi or whatever I need to do. But I start feeling so guilty that I’m not giving her more attention. Yes, she’s getting plenty of play time but she’s been with me 24/7 for so long that she struggles a bit with not having that anymore.

Getting mastitis didn’t help much. On top of being tired and having to take care of a newborn, I was also in a lot of pain and wasn’t spending time with Evelyn.

life with kids 005

 

The cool thing is that Evelyn is starting to learn how to play on her own. She has this doll house and barn and she can spend probably an hour playing by herself. She’s learned from playing with us how to pretend but if you sneak into her room and watch, it’s amazing to see how her imagination works.

It’s so strange to have two little minis that I love so desperately and not knowing how to divide my time with them. And for another level of confusion I have to figure out when I get a moment to myself to remember that I am more than the caretaker of my spawn. The struggle is real my friends.

I also realized how easy it is to do things with just one kid. Like when Evelyn was a newborn it stressed me out to try and do anything when it was just the two of us. But now it seems so simple as long as someone is watching Evelyn. I mean heck, newborns just sleep all the time.

life with kids 004

^^I love LOVE my double stroller. The seats can face in any direction.

And before I had Remi I thought running any errand with Evelyn was so much work. But the other day I had to run out and get my iphone screen fixed (thank you Evelyn) and I left Remi at home and thought the whole time how nice it was to just have Evelyn. It wasn’t that long ago that she was the only one I had to worry about. It’s funny how quickly your perspective can change.

I know I’ll get the hang of this parent of two thing because…well what other choice do I have? There are other people in the world who do this right?

So for all you seasoned mothers out there…What’s your advice on transitioning from one kid to two??